The thing that’s holding me back more than anything else is a touch of Impostor Syndrome, a dash of fear, a lot of pride, and a pinch of stubbornness.
However, part of the reason is that I see no results or, in truth, I feel “pushed” out of the way, usually to make room for someone or something else.
Don’t get me wrong, I want to *do* the thing, but between not knowing how to and not knowing when to, there are days when I feel stagnant. It’s made a whole lot worse when you feel as though you have no direction.
But then there’s the moment you actually do it. Does it come with relief? Sometimes. Does it come with reward? Hardly. Does it come with newfound anxiety? It sure does. What if I shouldn’t have done it? What if it was the wrong thing to do? What if it’s not received as I intended it to? The fear, the doubts, the worries all trickle down before rushing in like a roaring river.
Yet still, the voice of God says, “Do it for Him.” In all things, whatever we put our hands to, we do it for His absolute benefit. And there is comfort, knowing that once it is done for His glory, it is done.
As I continue to try and triumph in this life, I will remember that anything done for God is worth it.
Signed,
About
Written by R. ‘Nickay’ Headlam
Nickay is a writer and designer who grew up in the British Virgin Islands. Her passion for art, design, and writing grew into a blog, now called The RAVYN Blog, where she writes about her Christian journey, theology, current events, art and design, and fashion.
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