The RAVYN Blog

I remember around this time last year (2023) how many tears I shed. 

I cried, “I shouldn’t be in this position. I shouldn’t have to depend on anyone or anything to get where I need to go or do anything.” 

At the time, I was upset because so many things were happening in my life.

I was a teacher, earning very little pay and unable to afford rent or purchase a car. I felt stuck. Everyone else around me seemed to have it all together. They seemed to be able to afford the things I wanted. I was unhappy, miserable … envious, even. 

2023 was a harsh year for me. There was a lot of growing to do and a lot of backbone to build. I struggled to realize who I was, and begrudgingly faced each challenge that befell me. Throughout that year, I wanted to throw in the towel many times.

But 2024 was different.

New Year, New Me

2024 opened up with God’s promises over my life. There were things I was working towards, crying to Him about, praying to Him for. I didn’t know what was going to happen or how it was going to happen. And the truth was, I didn’t know if anything was going to happen at all. 

Doubt began to settle in, finding the darkest corners of my mind, whispering, “None of what God promised you is ever happening for you.”

Things seemed to get worse. My job slipped into a turbulent time, and I wondered how it had even come to this. Depression kicked in, tears fell, and I questioned God almost daily. Yet, slowly, without me even knowing, God was answering every prayer and drying every tear.

Overcoming the Doubt

The hardest thing to do as a Christian is overcome the doubts that settle within you. 

Yet, we are called to trust God, to know that He hears our prayers and has answered them. I’ve been around people who doubt the existence of God, but I know the truth of my life, the past that God brought me through. 

Amid those doubts, with a still, calm voice, He reminds me that He is here. 

He did many things for me; He did many things through me. He reminds me of the miracles He performed. He reminds me of His presence, His love.

During those moments, I held onto God even when I couldn’t see the way out, because I knew Him, and I knew that He ALWAYS made a way. 

I’ve seen Him create paths in places where there was only blockage, and I’ve witnessed Him create opportunities in places that seemed desolate. 

He knew the smallest desires of my heart, even the unspoken ones.

My Experience: Getting My Car

How it All Began: The Car

In 2023, I went to Florida for my brother’s graduation. Our Uber driver, a sweet, elderly lady (though she’s not elderly at all. She’s actually fun and kind), picked us up in a car that I was astounded by. 

I’d seen many newer cars, but it was the first time I’d actually ridden in one, and impressed at her ‘high-tech’ car, I remembered thinking, “I’d love to own a car like this.”

There weren’t many models like that in the BVI. Yes, they all had rearview cameras, and most allowed Bluetooth connection, but they weren’t nearly as advanced as the one I’d ridden in. 

When we arrived back in the BVI, my mother pointed out a Haval and asked, “Would you want one?”

My first answer was, “No.” It wasn’t about the aesthetics at the time. I just remembered thinking that Haval was a brand I hadn’t heard of. Also, at the same time, I couldn’t afford to buy a car.

The Transition Between 2023 and 2024

Later, some months after that conversation, my mother persuaded me to swing by a dealer to look at the cars, particularly the Haval model.

The owner or the dealership greeted us and introduced me to the 2024 Haval G6, a car that, to be honest, I was a bit apprehensive about. The car he’d shown me was the cheapest in his lineup at the time, around $27,000. He gave me a bill of sale, but I never took it to the bank until the following year. 

Even with the bill of sale in hand, I didn’t think I could actually afford to purchase the car. I wasn’t making enough money at my job, and I didn’t believe I could own something as fancy as the one I saw at the dealership. 

Yet, when 2024 rolled around, and it was time to set my goals and vision board, the Lord said to me, “Write down everything you want for 2024 and put a date to each of them.”

The New Year’s List

I wish I could show you what I wrote down, but some of the items on that list were personal. However, among the things I wrote down were:

• A new car (Haval – for March)
• Companionship (who would eventually become a husband – for Summer)
• A new job

I made the list, unsure of whether I’d get the items I wrote.

Spring is Here!

I decided to go to the bank (finally) with the bill of sale sometime in March. I knew my salary wouldn’t cover the loan, but I called a friend who worked at the bank and asked her what was needed. 

I submitted a request for a job letter that needed to include my salary, then I downloaded a few of my pay slips. When I received the job letter, I saw that my annual salary had increased by $20,000. I was overjoyed, but this new increase didn’t reflect on the pay slips I had. 

I went to the bank with all my documents, and … the car was gone. 

I was saddened. Realizing I needed a new bill of sale, I went to the dealership, and the salesperson showed me a few Haval G6 models, including the GT, which was more expensive than the one I had wanted. 

I explained to the salesperson that I couldn’t afford the model she showed me, and she said the one I wanted would be arriving in April. 

It was a letdown. I wasn’t on track to own a car by March, as per the list I created. I remembered asking God, “I planned to get the car in March; what’s happening?”

He replied, “Have some patience. We will extend until April, and that would give you more time.”

In that instance, I realized that while God had directed me to create a list of things I wanted with a timeframe, He was still working on His divine time, not mine. 

I decided to take a look at another car dealership, and the salesperson took me to see some Kia models. These cars were more expensive, less fancy, and the salesperson introduced a new form of doubt—the deposit.

Deep down, I knew this wasn’t the car God wanted me to have. However, while I looked at these cars to appease the hurt inside, I also knew that if I forced my timing onto God’s, I would’ve lost out on what God desired for me.

I went home, mentally preparing for a down payment, which would’ve been around $4,000—money I didn’t have. 

In my worries, God assured me that a down payment wouldn’t be necessary, but like the panic-driven person I was, I still calculated if I could truly afford it if it ever came to it. I ultimately decided to continue with the Haval, and I got the new bill of sale from the original dealership, which I brought to the loan officer. 

While I was in the office, I asked about the down payment, and she told me she’d try to build a case for me to get the full loan amount. 

There was a lot of waiting involved, but during that time, I operated in a faith that I knew was only through grace. I shopped around for car insurance, then received an email stating I was approved for the full loan amount. All I needed to do now was wait for my new car to arrive on island.

April 2024

In the first week of April, the loan officer called to ask about the car, so I did. The following day, I received a call from the salesperson with some devastating news.

The Haval model I wanted was no longer available; she had made an error on the bill of sale. I was disappointed, not fully understanding what she was telling me. However, she also stated that the 2025 Haval H6 GT was available and asked if I wanted to come in and look at it. 

I went into the dealership and looked at the Haval, under the condition that she would give me this more expensive model for the price of the original Haval I wanted, since she was the one who made the error. 

In one week, I walked away with a more expensive car (in the color I wanted), fully paid for by the bank. 

I also walked away with a salary that could cover the payments, and suddenly I realized that this experience in itself was a miracle, a testament to who God is. God’s divine timing shifted in a way that allowed me to get the exact car I desired for a price that I could afford.

God, the Grand Conductor of the Orchestra of Life

How do we view God and His timing?

Looking back at the list I created, I can confidently say that nothing I wrote on it happened during the time I wrote down for them. In fact, there are things on that list that haven’t come to pass yet. 

Yet I fully believe that God orchestrates everything that happens when I put my trust in Him.

He was the one who brought about the pay increase. He taught me confidence and discernment. He showed me how to recognize His voice. He controls the waves of time, speeding forward what needs to be done and holding back for when a better opportunity arises. 

He knits everything together; a more perfect moment could not have been harmonized just for me. 

Even through my doubts and worries, God is still here, and with each move He makes, these worries and doubts shrink.

At the Right Time

I spent this year underestimating how much the enemy would attack me; he knew that God was planning something major—something that I couldn’t see. 

When this year began, God gave me this statement:

God promised Israel a future glory, a place where there would be no suffering, and they would be exalted from their shame. In the very end, He says, “At the right time, I, the Lord, will make it happen.”

Doubts and worries may arise, but God will make it happen at the right time.

Signed,

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