Always at the Right Time | Divine Diaries (Apr 22, 2024)

I remember around this time last year (2023) how much I was in tears. I cried, “I shouldn’t be in this position.

I shouldn’t have to depend on anyone or anything to get where I need to go or do anything.” At the time, I was upset because so many things were happening in my life.

I was a teacher at the school, with very little pay, unable to afford to rent an apartment on my own or purchase a car. I felt stuck, like I was going nowhere. Others seemed to have it pulled together, seemed to be able to afford the things I wanted most. So, at the time, I was in tears.

The reality of 2023 was a harsh one. For me, there was a lot of growing to do, a lot of backbone to build, and willingness to take whatever was being pushed at me. I needed to realize who I was in Christ, to accept that God wanted best for me, no matter how that looked or what it was.

In the year 2023, I experienced things that truly put me down, and many times, I felt like throwing in the towel, calling it quits.

Yet … 2024 rolled in with a different persona—the promise that God was going to give me the things I’d been working towards, crying to Him about, asking Him for. The truth was, I didn’t know exactly how it was going to happen, if it was ever going to happen at all. I watched as doubt settled in, finding the darkest corners of my mind, and whispering, ‘none of this is going to happen.’

I watched how my job as a teacher only went from bad to worse, wondering how it happened that way. Depression would kick in, tears would flow, and I would ask God why this had to take place, but slowly, without me even knowing, God was answering every prayer and drying every tear.

Don’t Let Doubt Overcome You

I think, as a Christian, the hardest thing to do is overcome the doubt that settles in the deepest corner of your mind. The hardest thing is to trust that God is there, and He hears your prayers.

People around often doubt the existence and validity of God, and sometimes, those doubts can creep into me as well. But with a still and calm voice, He often reminds me that He is there.

He reminds me of things He did for me, the things He did through me. He reminds me of the little miracles that He performed, His presence, and His love. Throughout those moments of doubts, I hold onto God, even when I can’t see a way out, because knowing Him, he ALWAYS makes a way.

I’ve seen Him carve paths in places where there was only blockage, and I’ve witnessed Him create opportunities in places that seemed desolate.

If anything, God knows even the smallest desires of your heart, even the ones unspoken.

How it All Began

In May of 2023, I went to Florida for my brother’s graduation. Our Uber driver, a sweet, elderly lady (though, she’s not elderly at all. She’s actually fun and kind) picked us up. It was my first time being in a ‘high-tech’ car so-to-speak, and I remembered thinking to myself, ‘boy, would I love to own a car like this’.

I’ve never seen anything like it living in the BVI, used to only the basic automatic cars. The most ‘techy’ car I’ve seen was what my mother drove, a Kia Sportage, I believe a 2021 model.

When we arrived back to the BVI, I remembered my mother pointing out a Haval car, and asking ‘would you want one’, and without a beat, I answered a solid ‘no’. I couldn’t remember why I said ‘no’, but I am known to be very close-minded and stubborn. Most importantly, at the time, I didn’t think I would ever be able to afford a car.

The Transition Between 2023 and 2024

As the year 2023 wound down into the Christmas season, my mother and I decided to swing by a dealer just to look at cars. There, the owner of the dealership introduced me to the 2024 Haval G6 model, a techy car, that I was, to be honest, a bit apprehensive about until I saw what it could actually do.

It was the cheapest of the lineup he currently had, around $29,000, and he gave me a bill of sale, but I never actually went to the bank until the following year.

I should reiterate at this point, that I doubted I could ever purchase a car. I didn’t know what it would be like, I wasn’t making enough money at the school, and what was worse, was that I didn’t think I was capable of ever owning a car so fancy and pretty as the one shown to me in the dealership.

Yet … when 2024 rolled around and it was time to set my goals and vision board, the Lord said to me to write down everything that I want for 2024 and to put a date to them. I did that.

I wrote down everything I wanted, and wrote down that I wanted to own the Haval sometime in March of 2024. Wasn’t sure if it would happen, didn’t think I could do it, but I wrote it down anyway.

Spring is Here! – March 2024

As February/March kicked in, I decided I would go to the bank with the bill of sale, knowing that my salary wouldn’t be able to afford me a loan on a car. I called a friend who worked at the bank and asked her what I needed to bring. Bringing a job letter was one of those things I needed.

I put in the request for the job letter, which needed to state my salary and position, and when I retrieved the job letter, I saw that I had a nearly $20,000 annual increase from my current salary. I was so overjoyed, but to be honest, that increase didn’t reflect on my pay-slip, which still had the old salary.

Still, I went to the bank with everything I needed, and … the car was gone.

No problem, I just would need to get a new bill of sale. The salesperson showed me a new version of the Haval H6, the GT model, which was more expensive and fancier, but I told her that I couldn’t afford that.

She let me know that models that I had previously requested would be coming in April, and I remembered saying to God, “well, I planned to get the car in March, what’s happening?”

The Lord replied, “have some patience. We should extend it until April and that would give you more time.”

I decided around that time to take a look at another car dealership, and after waiting for a long period of time, the dealer took me to see some Kia models. They were slightly more expensive, but certainly not high-end and the salesperson for that car reintroduced another form of doubt—the deposit.

When I was at the bank, the loans officer never mentioned down payment, and I realized that if I did have to pay down a deposit on the car, it would be around $4000, which I didn’t really have. I was worried, but for a split moment, God assured me ‘there would be no sort of down payment’, and I just had to stick with what He said.

I decided ultimately that I would continue with the Haval, and I brought the new bill of sale to the bank, and the loans officer started the process. I asked her if I needed to pay a deposit, she said “I’ll try to build a case for you to get the full loan so you wouldn’t have to pay a deposit”.

I waited, I shopped around for car insurance, then I got the email saying I was approved for the full loan. All I needed to do was now wait for the car to arrive.

April 2024

In the first week of April, I got a call from the bank asking me to check in with the car dealership, which I did. The following day, the salesperson of the Haval I’d originally intended to have called me to say that those Haval models were no longer available, and that she’d made a mistake with the bill of sale.

She did, however, inform me that the Haval H6 GT was available, but that was the more expensive one. Yet, since the dealership made the error, they would give it to me for the price of the Haval I originally wanted.

In one week, I walked away with a more expensive car — (in the color I actually wanted, though my mother didn’t really want me to have a black car) — fully paid for by the bank.

I had a salary that could cover my car loan payments, and suddenly I realized that this in itself was a miracle, a testament to who God is. I realized that it wasn’t me, but rather God’s input, and I knew from the very beginning that it could’ve only been Him.

God, the Grand Conductor of the Orchestra of Life

God was the one who orchestrated that my pay increase came at the right time. He was the one who taught me confidence and discernment, how to recognize His voice.

He was the one who controlled the waves of time, speeding forward what needed to be done and holding back for when a better opportunity arose. He caused the salesperson to make a slip-up in the bill of sales, allowing me to get a better car for a lesser price.

He was the one who knitted it all together. A more perfect moment could not have been harmonized just for me.

Even through my doubts and worries, God was still there, and with each move He makes, the worries and doubts shrink smaller and smaller.

I felt pressured at my job this year, underestimating how much the enemy would attack me and cut me down because He saw that there was something in store for me. Yet, even in those moments, God knew exactly what He was doing, and all He required of me was patience.

The beginning of this year, I felt pressured to do many things, but then the Lord gave me this statement: “When the time is right, I, the Lord, will make it happen.”

Isaiah 60:22 (NLT), God promises Israel a future glory, a place where there is no suffering, where they will be exalted from their shame. In the very end, He says “At the right time, I, the Lord will make it happen.”